So I am going to be 31 tomorrow. I don't know why but I have been so excited to turn 31. I think it might be that I am trying really hard to make this my best year ever. Sure that sounds kind of lame, because don't we always try to make it the best year ever. Who knows about you, but I think I tend to let things slide and forget to take an active approach to how my life is going. If that makes any sense to you at all....then keep reading.
This year well it started last year but I really think that everything I do, say and act has super great affects upon where I will be today, tomorrow and in the really big future. Sure some of you may say that...DA like you didn't know this. Well, I didn't, not really, I feel as though I used to float through life with out much thought to how it might affect me down the line....(lets not even go into how it affects others...that may be another year). I guess I have come to the conclusion that I am a under a severe commitment phobia at the present time. This is not just with people it has to do with everything....job, activity, and pretty much anything else that I have to say, "okay I will do that." I just don't want to give a commitment to anything and lately I find that if I do I suddenly feel not happy and immediately regret the decision. It can be something as simple as I will go to that party with you or I will stay after and have a drink with you or as big as do I want to be a nurse. However, as soon as I make a decision not to make a decision I feel overwhelmingly better.....I mean the pressure or whatever is totally gone.
I guess this sort of makes me a pussy. But I figure if my decisions really affect my life that much...I should take as much time to think about it as possible or in my case take a little time off from thinking about it at all.
I have been thinking about things for so long....I am just stopping. This is my year of selfishness. I get this because I choose it and I don't have to worry about children or a husband...at the present time...I may want one or both later on. I think it will make be a better person later on. lets hope
What do you think....am I delayed in my thinking process? Did all of you go through this a long time ago? Did you go through it at all?
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11 comments:
Happy Birthday!!!! and Hooray for your year of selfishness - what are you going to do first???? If / when I ever get my year of selfishness I would hit Europe for several months, learn to speak French, and do yoga every day. AAHHH the thoughts of the future . . .
Happy Bday Big sis!! and I think that it could be good for you....way to go! does your selfishness including helping me move???? just kidding.
Hey! I found you through a comment you left on Shannon's blog.
Happy Birthday (today)! St. Patrick's Day and green reminds me of you. Remember how we wanted to build a zip line between our two houses? Wow! 31 years old may be too old to remember elemetary days like those!
Happy Birthday!!!! Paul was going to call you at 8:30 but was worried that it was to early, so just know we are thinking of you today!!!!!
happy bday....you are great and can't wait to give you 31 pinches....to help you grow an inch. hope you had a great day skiing or whatever you did.
Happy Birthday! I hope you had a great one! I think it's great that your brithday helps you to evaluate your life and to make resolutions for the future. I feel like I over-analyze things as well, but I have learned as you have, that sometimes it is better to simply do our best and just let life happen.
Happy birthday! I love you . I think you should be selfish!!! Someday i will do the same. Once my kids move out it is going to be all about me.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY! Making yourself happy is not selfishness. If you are trying to make descisions and you get peace from not making them then you are doing the right thing for your life! That's what I think. Selfish has a negative connotation. Have a wonderful year and just be happy.
Hey Jacque it's me again sorry but would you mind emailing me your email address. I am trying to set-up another girls night out with our friends and I thought it might be easier to do it over email. Thanks! My email address is shantastic@hotmail.com
happy birthday. i hope it was great. being selfish is okay for a while just don't become self absorbed. and making decisions that you are okay with runs in the family. i am always changing my mind. oh and will you bring your present back so i can take a picture of it. thanks.
Happy belated Birthday. Remember me? One of Nicole's friends from High school?
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