fun times

Okay so I always try to do things but I never quite make it to the destination....more of that commitment thing. Anyway, so I have been running, among other activities, and I am at 4 miles and some girls at work were talking about how they are running a 1/2 marathon in April. I thought maybe I can try and be ready for it. So I have upped my mileage to 5, which I am sure doesn't sound like a lot but it is an improvement in just a week. So I hope that but running that and getting it up to 6 and run that three times a week with one long run thrown in. Well I hope that I can make it and not die. I mean I haven't been training for very long. I am sort of worried about it. I think that I can do it. Are there any runners out there who have done something similar to this in a short amount of time.....am I foolish? Should I abandon ship and do a 10k? a 5K? am I up in the night?

I think that most important thing is that I would really like to try it. I hope that it works. I feel really great so far this week I have logged 12 miles and I hope to get 5 more tonight. With a long run on Sunday if it is nice and maybe still if it isn't nice.

house guests

I just had a friend come to stay with me for a week...Yes a whole week. I am suprised that he still wants to be my friend. I think I can drive any one crazy. I am not clean and I am really used to my own time schedule and I like to keep it. I move at a moments notice and I think you should be ready when I am. That said I am glad it is over even though it was nice to have him visit. I can get back to my stuff now. You know the stuff you do when you don't have to make sure other people are having a good time. Your personal shit whatever it is that you do for yoursself. Like cleaning out closets, rearranging furniture, getting your bike ready for spring and the list goes on. I always think of things that I want to do when other people are in town.

I am glad things are back to normal. I think that he still wants to be my friend since he invited me to visit him again. Sorry sisters you don't get to meet him and don't tell mom and dad you big mouths. We are nothing serious so I didn't want to bother anyone with meeting him.

almost birthday

So I am going to be 31 tomorrow. I don't know why but I have been so excited to turn 31. I think it might be that I am trying really hard to make this my best year ever. Sure that sounds kind of lame, because don't we always try to make it the best year ever. Who knows about you, but I think I tend to let things slide and forget to take an active approach to how my life is going. If that makes any sense to you at all....then keep reading.
This year well it started last year but I really think that everything I do, say and act has super great affects upon where I will be today, tomorrow and in the really big future. Sure some of you may say that...DA like you didn't know this. Well, I didn't, not really, I feel as though I used to float through life with out much thought to how it might affect me down the line....(lets not even go into how it affects others...that may be another year). I guess I have come to the conclusion that I am a under a severe commitment phobia at the present time. This is not just with people it has to do with everything....job, activity, and pretty much anything else that I have to say, "okay I will do that." I just don't want to give a commitment to anything and lately I find that if I do I suddenly feel not happy and immediately regret the decision. It can be something as simple as I will go to that party with you or I will stay after and have a drink with you or as big as do I want to be a nurse. However, as soon as I make a decision not to make a decision I feel overwhelmingly better.....I mean the pressure or whatever is totally gone.
I guess this sort of makes me a pussy. But I figure if my decisions really affect my life that much...I should take as much time to think about it as possible or in my case take a little time off from thinking about it at all.
I have been thinking about things for so long....I am just stopping. This is my year of selfishness. I get this because I choose it and I don't have to worry about children or a husband...at the present time...I may want one or both later on. I think it will make be a better person later on. lets hope

What do you think....am I delayed in my thinking process? Did all of you go through this a long time ago? Did you go through it at all?

I just wanted to mix things up a bit with the font....

I haven't been posting lately because I haven't been at the hospital...I work every other weekend. It probably makes no sense to anyone that doesn't no me well....I don't have internet at my house....I actually don't really have anything....I haven't had TV reception the whole time that I have lived there (almost 4 years). I am going to step into this century and get it though.....soon.

That sounds pretty interesting.....I am sure some people are asleep by now.

I like to go out and have a good time. I have gone out the past two nights in a row which is really rare for me to do. On Friday I went to canyon inn after I stopped by Porcupine. I tried to convince some guy that he should go and cut in on a couple that was dancing. I was going to buy him a drink if he did it....I think it would have been beneficial for all parties involved had he taken me up on the offer. The couple would have felt great becasue someone wanted the lady and they would have had awesome sex that night, the interupting guy would have a free drink and I would have a great time watching and laughing at everything. But my powers of persuasion were seriously lacking that evening. So sad. I still had a great time making fun of people....

I went to Urban Lounge last night for a hip/hop show. Can you say lots of boys and not so many ladies.....hell ya. I had a great time with a few friends just dancing/making fun/checking out the fresh meat that was in mass splendor. Oh and yeah listening to some great guys and some great tunes.....it was awesome. Nothing really funny happened. But there was a lady in the restroom at the same time as me and we were talking about washing hands....the soap dispensor was broken so you had to reach in and get soap ( i had my beer in my mouth so i wouln't touch it after i peed). She told me that they never have soap here...like it was really cool that she goes to that bar all the time....anyway she said that she was a stripper and that it didn't really matter if you wash your hands and that she never does when she is at work.....yuck....and why would you tell a stranger that. Let alone one that obviously has issues with washing her hands....yuck.

great day or bad day

Okay so it seams that everyday that I am active is a good day for me. I have lots of energy. My attitude it positive. I have lots and lots of energy. I notice that when I am not active I am generally a great mood or lets say a not very pleasant mood.
So needless to say the days that I am active work and life tends to go a lot better. However, there are those times when no matter how great my day and how great I feel, it seems that there are some people who just want to make me have a bad day. I try really hard to overcome this. In fact one of the only ways that I seems to be able to keep from going under their spell is too dance. So occasionally I will break into a dance move or something quick at the hospital or the restaurant just to make sure that I don't turn over to the dark side.
Sometimes I loose though. Last night I lost. No matter what I did to help out customers it just wasn't good enough. I just wanted to slap all the difficult patrons and say, "don't you get it I am a person too.....treat me like it." I just don't think it would help so I go talk to a manager and have them deal with it or laugh about it with my fellow serving staff in the back. Usually I get back to my place...but if not it is always gone when I walk out the door....I just leave it all behind.

Do any of you feel this way ever? What do you do when you just want to hit someone and say "treat me like I am a human too"?

judgemental single girl in slc at a bar

Hi so I went to a bar last night. It was one of my friends 31st birthdays it was good times as always at the jackalope....where you can get pabst tall boys....that is what I call a good time. So we are dancing talking and doing the regular type of things you do at a bar. There is this guy that keeps approaching every girl at the bar....I am with a lot of girls so he happens to be approaching a lot of people that I am with or know....he is a total tool. He had full chops and a long thin pony tail...alright not seemingly so bad but in conjunction with a leather jacket and really worn jeans with holes all over...not the most attractive of things. Still some of you may be saying still not so bad. He would grab his crotch from time to time and do little thrusts and some times he just did the thrusts. HOT....I mean seriously HOT. So every time he would go up to someone I knew I would immediately go up and act like I hadn't seen my friend for ever and get between them so he couldn't talk to them anymore. They all thanked me. So some guy that we were with (I don't know who he is) told me that I was being really judgemental. It sort of offended me. I was talking to one of my girlfriends about it and she told me not to worry because it was really just quality control. I like that QUALITY CONTROL.
That got me to thinking...yeah I am a judgemental person but I don't think it is bad. I just stop myself from having to deal with all the really crappy people that I am going to have to eventually get rid of in my life anyway. See I used to hang out with lots of people who were really just a drain on my life and a really negative influence and I got rid of those awful people a long time ago. I don't need to introduce and new losers into my life.

So Hell yeah I am a judgemental person.